Ball-Hog Or Tugboat?

My 90s Peak?

I had to quickly come up with a topic since I blew my Wednesday post on a Monday. I’ll keep it light. This is a story about a day that might have been the pinnacle of my entire 90s experience. Check out this video for Piss Bottle Man by Mike Watt (of The Minutemen and fIREHOSE). That’s Zander Schloss from Circle Jerks miming the part he played on the track. The other part, including the solo, is me. I don’t know who that is miming my part, and it isn’t the only time I’ve had someone pretend to play a part of mine in a music video. This is from Watt’s feature-laden first solo album, Ball-Hog or Tugboat?

I had the great good fortune to be friends with Watt in the early 90s. Our bands shared a booking agent, and Watt liked my bands. Yes, bands - both Blake Babies and Antenna opened fIREHOSE U.S. tours between 1990 and 1993. I got to know the members very well. Those were some of my favorite early touring experiences.

In 1994 I re-joined The Lemonheads after a 5-year hiatus. I’d been the drummer for a couple years in the 80s, then when I rejoined I played guitar. We spent most of the spring and summer on tour supporting Come On Feel The Lemonheads. Our Los Angeles show was in late July at the Fairfax High School auditorium. Fairfax High, in West Hollywood is where the Red Hot Chili Peppers guys met. It’s also the alma mater of Herb Alpert and Phil Spector. It’s a real life rock n’ roll high school. It’s also a decent theater venue, holding about 1,500.

Watt called Evan while we were on tour to ask if he’d do a guest vocal on a solo album he was making at Cherokee Studio in West Hollywood. I was in Evan’s room when he called, and I grabbed the phone to say hi. “JP!” He bellowed. “Gonna get you in on this too Strohm, can you throw down some Quine¹ shit for me?” “Sure,” I said. “Yes, thanks, I’d LOVE to.”

Watt is truly a unique individual. He carries himself like a longshoreman, always in a uniform of Levis, flannel shirt, and Chuck Taylors, carrying on a constant monologue consisting largely of a lingo conceived over a million hours of van life. He’s wise, but he’s also a wise guy. He’s easily one of the greatest and most inspiring humans I’ve ever met, and one of our greatest musical treasures. As a founder of The Minutemen, he pioneered U.S. hardcore punk. After the tragic death of Minutemen co-founder D Boon in 1985, he carried on first with fIREHOSE, with Ed “fROMOHIO” Crawford on guitar and lead vocals, then on a series of solo projects beginning with Ball Hog or Tugboat?

Watt sent us a barely-audible cassette of a song titled Piss Bottle Man a couple days before the session, I think it was just bass and vocal. It’s a rock song roughly in the style of The Who about how Watt’s old man kept a bottle in his truck so he didn’t have to stop to piss. A tribute of sorts. We crammed a bit the morning of the session and showed up probably 60% prepared. We’d have a chance to work it out in the studio, right?

We showed up at Cherokee early that afternoon and found Watt, the engineer, and Eddie Vedder in the control room. Watt was set up for Evan’s vocal, so he went straight into the booth. He seemed a little freaked out that Vedder was there, something was up. Then Eddie asked Watt if he could run the lyrics in to Evan, and Watt said sure. We watched through the window as Eddie walked towards Evan with the lyric sheet as Evan reached for it. Suddenly Eddie stopped a few feet short of Evan and dropped the lyric sheet on the ground, turned around and walked back to the control room.

He explained that his band, Mookie Blaylock, had been on a bill with Mudhoney and The Lemonheads back in 1989. He’d made a really cool flyer for the show, but when he gave one to Evan, Evan thoughtlessly dropped it on the ground. This was payback. I thought OK, guess we’re in for an interesting day.

Evan hastily bailed to the hotel after singing his part, and that meant it was my turn. I set up in the studio and Watt talked to me through the talkback mic. “Alright, listen,” he said. “The album is about wrestling. It’s a wrestling match. Every player is a wrestler, and the studio is the mat. If you fall down, you ain’t getting up. Those are the rules. One shot!” I couldn’t tell if he was kidding or not, but I figured I’d better nail it the first time. I was in a cold sweat with my brain working at about 800%, but I got through it. I felt enormous relief. Then…

“Nah, that’s too pretty! You ain’t Neil Schon! Give me some of that Quine shit!” “Do you want me to punch in?” “No! From the top!” I over-thought by working up a melodic solo that followed the chords. Watt wanted some circa ‘77 Bowery skronk. I ran it from the top, made some godawful abrasive noise over the solo, and that did the trick. That’s the one on the album.

After my part I came back to the control room to smiles and pats on the back. Eddie was a lot nicer after Evan left, and we said around talking for a while. Watt invited me to stick around for Eddie’s vocal, but I said I had to walk a few blocks to Fairfax High to see if it was time to soundcheck.² Eddie asked if he could tag along. “Sure,” I said. We set out as he explained to me he used to shoot hoops at Fairfax High as a kid, he wanted to see if it still looked the same.

We got there and soundcheck was still a couple hours away, so I decided to have a little fun. Remember that in 1994, months after Kurt Cobain died, Eddie was the biggest rock star on the planet. That whole rivalry between Nirvana and Pearl Jam? It was very real. Except, as far as I could tell, most if not all of the animosity was in the Nirvana camp. We had a crew member I won’t name who worked for Nirvana for years. She used to make fun of Pearl Jam constantly. She hated that band. I wasn’t a huge fan but I liked a few songs. Anyway I made a point to introduce Eddie to the Eddie hater. “Hey, Eddie, this is _________, our ______________! She lives in Seattle!” He came right over and extended his hand. “Oh, hey, so nice to meet you!” She limply took his hand while gritting her teeth, shooting me a murderous glance. I feel weird about it now, but I just couldn’t. That rivalry shit was just dumb. Also, the track on Ball Hog with Vedder singing is Against The 70’s, which also features Dave Grohl in his first studio performance after Kurt died! So I guess it can’t have been that big a deal. It doesn’t seem that Foo Fighters carried the rivalry forward.

On the way back to the studio we passed a huge dumpster in the corner of a large parking lot. Something caught Eddie’s eye and he ran to the dumpster and pulled himself in. He came out with a dusty old wet suit. “Hey,” he said. “Check this out, it’s in pretty good shape!” I was thinking OK, you’re the world’s biggest rock star, can’t you just ask some minder to pick you up a wetsuit? But there were no minders. It was just me and Eddie, dragging this ratty old wetsuit back to Cherokee Studio.

When we got back Eddie disappeared into the bowels of the studio for a half-hour or so while the engineer lit up a joint. Finally Eddie appeared in the vocal booth, wearing the wetsuit. It was way too big for him, sleeves covering his hands. But he wore the wetsuit when he sang his part on Against The 70’s.

Ball Hog or Tugboat is truly an amazing timepiece and a surprisingly good album. It’s a testament to Watt’s legendary status that he could bring this amazing group of musicians³ together. All these players respected Watt both as a founder, innovator, and standard-bearer for U.S. punk, alternative, and hardcore and as a superior musician and songwriter. That July day was memorable in a lot of ways and I’m grateful to have lived that life - but mostly I’m grateful for the opportunity and acknowledgement from a musical idol who has inspired me since before I ever played a gig.

1. Genius guitarist of The Voidoids and 80s Lou Reed band I've studied obsessively.

2. Remember before cell phones? How did we do it.

3. Over 50 musicians, including members of Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Foo Fighters, Dinosaur, Jr., Sonic Youth, Pixies, RHCP, Screaming Trees, Bikini Kill, Black Flag, Circle Jerks, Jane’s Addiction, Wilco, That Dog, Jane’s Addiction, Beastie Boys, Meat Puppets, Soul Asylum, Parliament…I’m sure I’m forgetting something.