i 'enjoyed' reading this! well-expressed, and in many ways very similar to what i was thinking growing up and different in some ways. but, we ended up at the same 'place', ha ha. and, yeah, no regrets. thanks for this, xxxcm
Sorry I wasn't there for you during that time, it sounds like a lot of anxiety and self punishment in those formative years and toss the divorce into the mix. If only there was a way to stretch back in time and tell the you of the long long ago that things will work out.
Having gone through a remarkably similar childhood to young adulthood experience (my escapism though was the much less practical D&D) I have to say that, cliche as it sounds, the struggle made me ... not a better person, but a more aware person and definitely a more empathetic educator, school administrator and especially a parent.
So glad you found this, Eric! It was a major traumatic event for me, when you moved away...but that's a testament to the strength of our friendship, which was formative for me. I think the divorce was a bigger cause, I was acting out as you'd expect. But, as I've laid it out here, I'm not only grateful for all of it, I think the trauma of those years helped me emerge as a creative person, which has brought me more joy than anything other than my family. I'm stoked that my kids want to live more conventional lives because it's going to be easier and less worry for us. But I have no regrets at all.
I was an academic star - I was 1 of 5 in my class of 200 to make National Merit, and I may still have the district record for a verbal score - but not being perfect was never good enough. I got a B or a B+ in math in 7th grade, and my homeroom teacher started riding my ass for not having straight As. Which really pissed me off because I knew I was smarter than my teachers. Took a lot of restraint not to tell her to fuck off.
Oh my God. That photograph of you. The look says “please don’t hurt me!”
Slow out the gate.
i 'enjoyed' reading this! well-expressed, and in many ways very similar to what i was thinking growing up and different in some ways. but, we ended up at the same 'place', ha ha. and, yeah, no regrets. thanks for this, xxxcm
Sorry I wasn't there for you during that time, it sounds like a lot of anxiety and self punishment in those formative years and toss the divorce into the mix. If only there was a way to stretch back in time and tell the you of the long long ago that things will work out.
Having gone through a remarkably similar childhood to young adulthood experience (my escapism though was the much less practical D&D) I have to say that, cliche as it sounds, the struggle made me ... not a better person, but a more aware person and definitely a more empathetic educator, school administrator and especially a parent.
What a long strange trip it's been eh my friend.
So glad you found this, Eric! It was a major traumatic event for me, when you moved away...but that's a testament to the strength of our friendship, which was formative for me. I think the divorce was a bigger cause, I was acting out as you'd expect. But, as I've laid it out here, I'm not only grateful for all of it, I think the trauma of those years helped me emerge as a creative person, which has brought me more joy than anything other than my family. I'm stoked that my kids want to live more conventional lives because it's going to be easier and less worry for us. But I have no regrets at all.
As a 57 year old slacker biding his time at a government job waiting for retirement, I totally feel this post.
Another dandy stack...hope all is well in music city...find a hole of water somewhere and try not to melt.
I did an outdoor workout at 5:30 this morning and had to towel off afterwards. Just brutal heat + humidity.
57 in lovely Carmel...up to a brutal hi of 61...garden spot. Come visit!
not Indiana LOL
Figured! Yeah man we’re there!
I was an academic star - I was 1 of 5 in my class of 200 to make National Merit, and I may still have the district record for a verbal score - but not being perfect was never good enough. I got a B or a B+ in math in 7th grade, and my homeroom teacher started riding my ass for not having straight As. Which really pissed me off because I knew I was smarter than my teachers. Took a lot of restraint not to tell her to fuck off.
That’s like my daughter, who has only made on B in her life.